Let me in; Push me out

I can't believe this. Without fail and without even trying I am a fool for him. I let myself believe that it is going to be something different this time and that it has changed and there is something there.

Just accept it. When it comes down to the bottom line friendship is all that is there and by no stretch of your imagination; no matter how hard I try or want it; it isn't going to happen. Get over him and move on to someone or something else. He certainly isn't worth the aggravation and there is no reason to think that he is. One-way roads don't let two directions flow.

When I finally understand this truly, I hopefully will stop getting so easily hurt.

Do you know what the stupid thing is? I was told by him that I was like this. Maybe not in this manner of speaking and certainly not referring to these feelings, but he was right. I am too easily offended like right now. But I am not backing down on the pain this time 'cos there is no way that this is just the "love" working here. This is breaking both, any thought of that and now it seems even friendship.

The most annoying thing about this, is that when I next speak to him properly, when it comes to that call - I will fall all over again. I can't stop it from happening either.

DeeJay,

You told me earlier today how stupid it was when you saw this exact thing happen in reverse yesterday, but here it goes again.

What a sucker, is all I can say.